Especially If, Especially IF

As I edit my memoir, I can see, at last with clear eyes, what a lousy, substandard person I was. My character wasn't just flawed, it was defective. But change is possible. Especially if you believe in miracles. Especially if you're optimistic and persuaded by good. Especially if you have sisters that you can call drunk in the middle of the night and say, "I'm so bad, I wanna kill myself." And those sisters ask, "What's stopping you?" Especially if you like to read so you can learn, become enlightened. Especially if you have visions of big success.